Sunday, December 31, 2006
Thursday, October 26, 2006
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Thursday, October 05, 2006
But before all that, in Denver, before I meet Chris, I was still with Portland guy and because we were late leaving St. Louis, we were late getting to Denver and had to sit there for 8 hours. Well Portland guy didn't want to sleep in a station again. So me him and another chick went and got a motel room.. Portland guy and that other chick, well they hooked up. It was great fun.. really.. OK, now back to Chris and the rest of it. Somewhere in Utah we picked up this family. And WOW! They were something else! The boy was like 15 or 16 and would not shut up. He kept going on about yu-gi-oh cards! And we over heard his dad talking about how him and his son are not allowed back into Canada. What the hell do you have to do to get kicked out of a country?! Anyways, we were stopped somewhere and his dad was talking about our next stop and said it was "Only a can and a half of beer away". Now I have lived in the south for almost 6 years, and I do believe that was the most southern, white-trashy thing I have ever heard! Me and Chris were like OK.. We're getting back on the bus now bye. I also met 2 gay guys on this trip and one of them decided to throw pennies at that kid who wouldn't shut up. It didn't work.. Well finally they got off and so did one of the gay guys. I ended up sitting next to this old lady who kept talking about her cats (yes I am aware that someday that will most likely be me, that's why I talked to her..). I keep trying to give Chris and Max (that is the gay guy) a look for help, but they didn't notice. Max was to busy trying to talk a guy into being his nanny. Max told Chris and me that he wanted to keep us.. =) Well we finally made it to Portland. I was bout 7 hours behind, but made it. My mom picked me up there instead of me having to endure the bus ride to Eugene. We almost didn't make in time for me to catch that bus anyways. I don't remember the trip back, which means it was uneventful.. oh well.. That's just one of my many Adventures! I have a few more from train trips many years ago!! But another time maybe..
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Monday, September 18, 2006
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Monday, August 14, 2006
As soon as your guard is down,
The enemy penetrates and rips
Apart everything inside.
Taking only what he wants,
Leaving behind, chaos,
Destruction, and death.
If you look closely, you can see,
The trail of blood from my heart,
That he ripped out and took with him.
Love is a war in the battlefields of life.
Love can not be trusted.
For it was love that did this to me.
He is out there, looking for his next victim.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Saturday, June 17, 2006
Thursday, May 25, 2006
It is so hot outside! We are having a field day. The school rented a bunch of those moon bounce things. We had one that is a maze, then there was an obstacle course and a slide and of course the classic moon bounce.. We have been outside all day! It's like 90 something degrees out there. I think all the kids are melting. They are all ready to go inside. There are still a few trying to beat the heat and keep playing, but most have found a shady spot to sit in. I think I burnt my shoulders. I would of worn shorts today, but I didn't think I should scare the children(I have not shaved in like a month..). So yeah, it's been great fun today. Tomorrow is our last day of school. 2 weeks after that I will be headed for summer camp. At least I have 2 weeks off before I have to go to camp! =) I just realized how sticky my hands are. The kids had freezer pops and I was cutting the ends off for them. The scissors got real sticky, thus, so did my hand. Anyways, that's all for now.
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
I was talking to my mom the other day and we were discussing what my earliest memory was. I told here It was my oldest sister handcuffed to the piano. I also remember playing hide and go seek with her and not being able to find her, because she ran away. I told here, no wonder I turned out the way I did. That's some traumatizing stuff for a kid. I couldn't of been more than 5 or 6 at the time.. There is so much of my child hood that I have blocked out. Some of the things I do remember, no one else does. I wanna say that I have some deep seeded issues, but really, they aren't that deep and I know the cause of all my issues. Rachel. Rachel is my twin sister. When we were 7 months old she got sick and ended up losing her hearing. So it was "Awe poor little deaf girl". I would get pushed aside. When we turned 8 she had a near drowning incident. The results from that were some brain damage and seizures. So she became the poor little deaf girl with seizures, and as for me I got pushed aside even further. By the time I reached middle school, I really had a lot of resentment towards her. My mom had tried to have a special day once a month with me but that didn't last very long. During my 8th grade year my sister became very violent with her behavior. She would try to beat the shit out of us if she didn't get what she wanted. Most of the time I stepped in and took all the beatings for my mom. I realized at one point during that time, that I had made many wishes to take away every thing that was wrong with Rachel and have it put on me instead. I would say to myself, "Why couldn't I be Rachel". Towards the end of middle school and for all of my high school years my mom was never there. She went back to school. Most of the time I would end up walking home from school because my mother would forget about picking me up, or forget about giving my bus money. I didn't like my mom back then. She would never let me go anywhere or do anything. She would accuse me of doing all kinds of things. Finally I started to do them. I skipped most of my 9th grade year. For 10th grade my mom sent me to a private school. I hated her for that. She took me away from all my friends again. She kept thinking I was going to end up like my older brother and sister. She didn't trust me. I hated that. I didn't do anything to bad. Except for the skipping school thing I hadn't done anything to make her not trust me. Oh gosh, I'm sorry for going on like this, I forgot what it was I had started to talk about before all this came out. I was in a good mood early, then all of a sudden I just started wanting to cry. There's just a lot going on right now. Last week of school, and stuff in my home life. It's stressful..
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
So, about a month and a half ago I got a ticket for not having insurance and my tags being expired. I had to go to court yesterday. I sat there for an hour and a half before they got to me. The judge didn't even really look at my papers or anything. He just asked me If I plead guilty or not guilty to both of my charges. I plead guilty. He told me if I needed to make payment arrangements I needed to sit down and wait to talk to the sheriff. So I did. The next thing I knew me and 2 other girls that were waiting also, got wisked off to the back and ended up in a holding cell. They didn't take my purse or my cell phone, so I started texting my mother to let her know where I was. Before she could answer another girl got brought in and she had her phone in her hand so the guard or whatever he was said he needed to take it away from her. He then looked in the cell and said "any one else have a phone?" I just kinda looked at him stupidly, hoping he wouldn't take my purse away from me. He did. There went my phone.. It was like an hour later that I got to make my calls. I called Kate since I knew she would answer and she could tell David or whoever. I needed $215 dollars to get out. David's mom bailed me out.. She ended up paying like $285. Thank you Mom!!( I will get you paid back. It may take a bit..) They served lunch while I was there. Jail food is not the best.. I was so close to being booked! The lady guard was all about putting me in stripes (Yes, in the state of Arkansas, the prisoners wear stripes..) I was in there for like 2 and a half hours.. It really sucked. At one point there was 5 of us in that itty-bitty cell.. I was the only white girl. It was a little before one when David came and sprang me out of jail. I had already called the school and told them I got held up at the appointment I had and would be there when I could. Ha! I skipped out on work for the rest of the day! Shh don't tell anyone! So I call my mother once I got out to let her know I was ok. She had made some comment about that's as far as she ever got as well ( referring to the holding cell). I about lost it. If you know my mother at all, she can be real over protective. I was like not allowed to go any where. Me and my friends had to sneak out of the house after she was asleep just so we could get a slurpee at the local 7-11. My mother went to jail for shoplifting!! I couldn't believe it! Lately the more I talk to her, more stories about her back in the day come out. I also found out she smoked pot.. Well anyways, that's all for now!
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Next week is our last week of school and on Wednesday we will be having a graduation ceremony type of thing. All year the school has had sort of a cowboy theme for everything and the teacher in my class thought the kids should do some songs and a dance for the parents at the ceremony. So all day we have been learning how to line dance. Usually with something like this I just sit back and watch, but my kid wasn't picking it up. So I had to get in line right next to him and dance along. It seems everyday that I'm down in the south, I become a bit more southern. Today I caught myself saying tin instead of ten. Its sad, really, it is... Even my writting is starting to sound southern. If I don't look over what I have written, there might me a "reckon" or a "fixin to" or a "done did" in there somewhere.. Oh well.
Thursday, May 11, 2006
Monday, May 08, 2006
The first night of the Beale street music fest was AWESOME!! We had to stand in line for almost 2 hours, but it was worth it. We got there way early which was good cuz traffic was backed way up and the line was really long. It was such a hippie fest I was having flashbacks to my days in Oregon. All the little tents with the hippie clothes and what not, it was like walking around downtown Eugene during the Saturday market. We got to see Puddle of Mud play and Jason Maraz, Buckcherry, Marty Casey and the lovehammers and I got to see a little bit of Train. Right around the time Train started David and I got separated. We had a meeting point and I went to it and stood there for about 5 min before I said fuck it. The only band I really cared about seeing was Train. So I went to the stage Train was playing on and was there for maybe 10 min before I thought I should go back and look for David. Went back to our meeting place, he still wasn't there so I went back to see Train. David finally called me (I would of called him, but I knew he left his phone in the car), Well they wouldn't lest him back in so we had to leave. I got to hear maybe 3 songs from Train.. After that we went to the Gay bar. They had a drag show that night. Great fun!! We didn't get home till 2:30 slept till 2 the next day and headed back. Saturday wasn't as much fun.. It rained. And the bands they had playing really sucked. So we went and walked up and down Beale Street. That's where everyone was... Anyways we left early that day and David didn't want to go back on Sunday which kinda pissed me off. I bought tickets for the whole weekend. If I had known that he didn't want to go all three days I would of only got tickets for 2 days. And If I had known sat night that he didn't want to go Sunday I would of sold my tickets while we were down there... I understand he was tired, so was I. My legs are killing me from all the walking we did, but he should of let me know before I bought the tickets that he didn't want to go all three days. I couldn't find anyone else to go with me so the tickets were wasted..
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Thursday, April 13, 2006
Today my school celebrated Arbor Day. Smokey Bear came out for all the kids to see. He gave everyone of them a hug. A group of kids in my class pushed me in to his arms. So today I got a hug from Smokey Bear. After everyone was done hugging the guy in the bear suit we all went out and planted some trees. Did I mention it is really hot today? So yeah while we were waiting for our class to plant their tree I noticed a guy that I didn't see earlier in the assembly (he must of been the guy in the bear outfit) who looked like someone I knew a few years ago. I didn't think it was possible since I don't know anyone in this part of Arkansas except for my 2 friends. Well I was right. It was Cameron, who I worked with at Burger King like 4 years ago. Last time I saw him I had just moved to Stuttgart and was working for KFC. I spent the night at a fellow KFC employee's house in Cabot. When I woke up Cameron was standing over me. Weird. We use to hang out all the time.. He was at my school because he is now a park ranger guy for this area. He lives about an hour from where I live. It was very weird seeing him here.. It's been a long time since I have seen any of my old Burger King friends..
I was going through some of my pictures last night, when I found the ones from my Vegas trip.
I went to Las Vegas with my dad for spring break when I was 16. My dad being real into poetry and what not, we went there for a week long poetry jam. It was great fun. On the train from Oregon to Cali I meet 2 teenagers about my age that were going to Cali for their spring break. We had the whole bottom car of the train to ourselves. They brought tequila. That was the first time I ever got drunk. It was bad.. Anyways the guy on the left was at the poetry jam and I had this huge crush on him. All I know about him is his name ( wich I won't tell) and that he lives in Canada. Once we were in Vegas I ended up sharing a Hotel room with 2 people I didn't know, Greg and Zoe. I don't really remeber why.. But Greg and Zoe were cool, I liked them. Infact me and Zoe kept in touch for a while.. Greg, Zoe, That guy above myself and a few others took a day trip to see the Red Rocks. Let me tell ya, they are red and they are rocks. Really no point in seeing them unless you have a fetish for rocks.. But on the way there some of the guy's decided they wanted to smoke some pot. I didn't really care, but Zoe got all kinds of mad. Then she told my dad that they smoked infront of me and he got all kinds of mad. Well that night Greg and I went to get some food. No one else was around, so it was just us. I had to ask my daddy's permission first of course. Wouldn't want to send me out on the strip, with a guy who smoke pot now would he? Let's forget the fact that I'm sharing a room with the guy. But anyways We talked and stuff. He apologized, I said I didn't really care. When I pulle dout a cig he was like OMG! you smoke and I was like OMG you want one? Everything was cool after that.
The other picture is of a really awesome store. It's called the Attic and they sell vintage everything. That store was so cool. Infact if I ever go back to Vegas it will be so I can shop there!! Well that and the fact that I'm now old enough to walk around in a casino by myself is a plus. Well anyways that was my trip to Vegas. I'm sure I left some stuff out.. This is everything that stood out enough in my mind to remeber..
We've had an interesting morning so far. We had a bird in our office (the room I share with the resource teacher). We had a couple of kids in the room at the time. It was great fun.. Damn bird scared the crap out of me. I don't know how it got into our room, it just kinda fell out of the ceiling, I guess. SO anyways, thats my excieting news for the morning. Oh and momma cat came home yesterday, after being gone for a week. She has some wounds on her face, nothing to bad. She must have been in some kind of fight. Her wounds look ok now, but I'm sure a couple days ago they looked real bad..
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
Anyways I was going to post some pictures of my babies ( the kittens). I took a few pictures of them last night, but they wern't very good.. I cut their heads off.. I'll try again tonight.. Well I guess I better go.
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
I forgot to mention that they let my dad out of the hospital late last week. He is doing much better. I can hold a conversation with him for more than 5 min. It's good! That's my dad. Here is a link to his poetry page Donn Deedon It's got a lot of his stuff and some from other people including my sister and myself. Well anyways, schools out, so I'm gonna go home and feed some whinny kittens..
I saw this on an Oregon Coast website some where and thought it was cute ( the picture on the left). I love stupid silly signs like this. I miss the ocean so bad! I think the only thing that could get me to move back to Oregon would be the scenery. Don't get me wrong, I love my family and all, but after 2 weeks I'd be ready to pack up and leave again! Leigh Keeps asking me if someday we could move out of the south. He wants to go back to San Fran. I told him I don't care where we go to as long as its on the coast! My mom takes weekend trips all the time and sends me pictures. I think I have about 70 on my bedroom wall. Its not the same as being there, but it helps me get through till the next time I go..